My “Young Me” Story
Follow my upbringing to see where I landed in my adulthood and parenting! Start at the beginning…
My mother and father were 18 and 20 when they got married (she was not pregnant). Mom delivered me 2 days before her 20th birthday, in Brooklyn, NY.
So, I grew up an only child with a single mom in an Irish catholic community in Rockaway Beach, NY (that’s a part of Queens). My parents divorced when I was a baby and I never met my father until I sought him out in my 20’s. Two of my aunts lived within walking distance and I spent a fair amount of time playing with my cousins. Matter of fact, one cousin and I were “twins,” born 18 hours apart and inseparable as children. It didn’t matter that we were opposite sex either, I was a tomboy through and through. My aunt (his mom) was like my second mother in those early years. She helped raise me when she could. For obvious reasons, my mother was a full-time working mom commuting into NYC everyday and I barely saw her. By the time I was 6 or 7, I was self-sufficient. This meant I went home alone, got my homework done, did the household chores and had dinner ready for mom when she came home 4 hours later. Until I was 12, this was a standard afternoon.
As an only child, I yearned to have the big families that my friends all had. It always seemed there was something to do, some place to go, someone to talk to or some event going on- good or bad. Of course, my friends thought it would be great to get rid of their siblings and live my life. The grass always looks greener, doesn’t it? The best part of living in a community of large families was that I LOVED children and spent my childhood being the babysitter of the neighborhood. As a young entrepreneur, I learned quickly the value of a dollar, even though my goals were from the heart!
On a side note, when I was 8 my friend invited me over to play. Her mom had just had a baby and was lying on the pullout couch in the living room feeding her new baby brother. I had never seen someone breastfeed before and was mesmerized. That five-minute visual stayed with me for the rest of my life. It was so impactful that I made a vow to “do that” when I have kids and so I did! (Later on, I became Benjamin’s regular babysitter)
In school, I was a gifted child and enjoyed learning. Always a spelling bee champ and avid reader! Even now, I could recite all my grammar schoolteachers’ names and visualize their faces. (That’s quite a lot of years ago to remember). Mom didn’t sign me up for anything after school so I climbed trees, went to the beach, played street ball, man hunt and kick the can for fun. If I did my chores and homework, I could stay out until the “lights came on!” When it was too cold or my friends weren’t out, I stayed inside and did art or played with toys until mom got home. We didn’t have pets for too long. Mom tried a puppy once, Rusty, but that was too hard. I did have a parakeet for a little while and fish here and there, but they didn’t live long. I learned to play with my friends pets instead.
I do have memories of playing games with my mom, mostly monopoly or cards. Watching TV together wasn’t really a thing. She worked for an airline and went on trips often. I did get to go to Disney when I was 8 and San Francisco at 11. We visited her friends in Kentucky a few times as well. I didn’t see her often, but she tried hard and meant well. To me, mom was the center of my universe and I wanted to spend time with her and play together. I even remember begging mom to have a baby or more likely I said, “give me a brother or sister.” Of course, during those tender years, I had no idea what was involved in baby making. I just wanted us to have a big family so I wouldn’t be so lonely. She never obliged.
Then, mom got remarried (unbeknownst to me) when I was 11 and that’s when my life turned upside down.
Read my teen years to learn more about the woman behind the blogs!
